One of the biggest shifts that I’ve had recently on this path towards mindfulness and getting back to the root of my true authentic self is within social media. As crazy as it might sound, this is probably the best thing that’s happened to me in a long time.
For me, social media has been all consuming.
While it’s a beautiful tool, it can rear it’s ugly head if you don’t use it wisely — but to use it wisely — you have to be whole on your own, and free of self doubt. Two things I’ve been struggling with for as long as I can remember. In this post, I talked a lot about my need for validation. I remember as a kid when I would play sports — whether it was basketball or figure skating, always looking to the crowd to find my mom or my dad, or looking at my coach hoping for that nod or shout of encouragement and approval. This carried on throughout my adult life, and I believe it’s a lot of what got me into photography. What a surefire way to get validation, right? You take the photos, you deliver them, and you get praise.
When you spend majority of your life and your energy looking for validation, you forget to create for yourself. Speak for yourself. Live for yourself.
And when you do that, you get further and further away from your root essence. With all of the internal, inward work I’ve been doing (and it’s been A LOT), I’ve finally come to recognize this damaging pattern and take hold. Can I please just take a minute to tell you how free I feel?
Now that I know where it stems from and why I’ve for as long as I can remember looked for approval in others (hello Instagram likes and blog post ratings), I’m able to acknowledge the fear and the judgement, let it go, and start living life without it. This blog is no longer a place where I’m validated – rather it’s a place where I’m free to create and show up 100% myself — nothing more, nothing less. Instagram is no longer a tool to compare and seek attention, rather it’s another form of an online journal where I can share my thoughts and growth, learnings and muses, loves and passions with anyone who wants to listen. Facebook is much the same — an online documentation of progress and talking points, and the private Facebook group (that’s just about ready to be launched, but you can request to join now!) is a safe space designated to community and everyone showing up to be heard and valued and loved,
just as they are.
Another tactic with staying mindful in the midst of social media is having intent while you’re connected. Are you on Instagram for a reason? Or are you bored? Are you posting something for validation? If so, why do you feel like you need it? Before you log in, think both of these things to yourself and see what comes up for you. I’ve opted to stop logging in unless I have a sole purpose for being there — i.e. if I’m sharing a blog post, if I’ve had a thought I want to share or if I want to laugh. If that’s the case, I purposely seek out certain accounts that lift up my spirits and ignite my energy, and discard the rest.
That’s what being mindful is all about, loves. It’s recognizing your patterns, knowing your purpose for why you do what you do, and making an effort to ensure that at the root of it all — you have your best interest at heart..
that you become the only validation that you’ll ever need.
Here for you always, should you need it. x4